Who To Trust?

I hate feeling like I do not know who I can and can not trust. It is a terrible battle in my head on who to believe and what to believe. If people were just super honest with each other this would not be an issue but hey, welcome to the real world. I am not going to go on a super long rant, though I could, I am just going to say a few things.

1) If you have something to say, say it to my face, don't run to everyone else. I WILL FIND OUT! I always do. This goes to many people.

2) Understand that my relationship is MY relationship. If I do not want to share things with you and tell you everything, that's because it is personal. People want to mess with me and my life that is fine, but just stay out of my personal business.

3) If you are going to insult me, lose the word "fat". I am sorry I am not super tiny and anorexic looking but if you are looking to hurt me, come up with something good at least.

4) I know I am hard to love, but if you are going to love me, friends, family, boyfriend, anyone, love ALL of me. I can't stand it when people only want to be around me when I am in certain moods and such. SO annoying.

Sorry I am a bit cranky if you haven't noticed. Still love you all<3

Back on the Farm

Well came back to Farmington today....not super thrilled but hey what can ya do?

I had an AMAZING Thanksgiving! Work was crazy, but sitting down to eat with the ones I love over not only one but TWO dinners was amazing! I feel as though I did not say what I am thankful for though, so better late than never right?

*I am thankful for having an amazing Memere and Tatante by my side. They have taken me in when I had nowhere to go and that is love. They have given me everything that I need and more and are the two most amazing women I have ever met. I am not very religious, but God put them on this planet to do good and dammit they do!

*I am thankful for an amazing boyfriend who stands by me through thick and thin, through the ups and downs and good times in bad. Snuggling with him on his couch in front of the fire is the most wonderful feeling I have ever felt. With him it is always wonderful, but this Thanksgiving break really made me realize how lucky I am to have him.

*I am thankful for my boyfriend's family. I feel that I have a very good relationship with them and that means a lot to me. I like knowing that I can text or message his mom when things are tough and I need advice. I like knowing that I can talk to his brother about things, nothing especially important, but I can talk to him. I love that his poppa welcomes me into his home with open arms, he really makes me feel like I am family. I love that his Grammie gives me real advice on things, and does NOT sugar coat them.

*I am thankful for being in school. I whine and complain about it, but I need to get a degree and I am thankful that I can pay for it, with the help of my family, and I am thankful for the opportunity to better myself.

*I am thankful for a wonderful roomie. We have ur ups and downs and rough moments, but honestly I don't know who else would be able to put up with my crap. I am a tough person to love and to get along with and she does a fantastic job.

*I am thankful that I know who my real friends are. When I went back to work in Auburn for a few days, everyone acted all excited to see me. Even if we don't all get along all the time, it was nice to see that I WAS missed and that I was welcome back.

*I am thankful that I do not have everything. I am thankful that I make mistakes. And most of all, I am thankful that I can't even write down all the things that I am thankful for, because that shows that you have a good life.

I'M GOING HOME!

Yay!!! I am soo happy! At 3:30 today I get to head home until Sunday! I am so excited! Not only am I going home but on Thursday I get to enjoy not only one but TWO Thanksgivings!! I am working in the morning, and when I get out I will be going to my house for some yummy dinner and then after that I get to go to CJ's parents house for ANOTHER dinner! Boy am I gonna have to work out after that!


It is going to be so nice to sleep in my own bed, take a shower and not have to wear flip flops, and play with my puppy! Is it weird that I am actually excited to go back to work in Auburn!?!? I never thought I would say that! But I miss it there A LOT!


I have decided to have a song of the day, or post, or whatever I manage to remember! Here is today's, Letters From Home:

Basketball Game Tonight!

*Tonight should be a fun one! Our UMF ladies are going against UMPI tonight in the first home basketball game of the season! I think Chelsey is coming up tonight so her and I will go cheer our beavers on :)


*This weekend I am working 12-6 both days.....gross but the money is definitely needed!


*I get to go home Tuesday!! I am so excited!! It will be nice to be home with friends and family and also to work in Auburn again! I am PSYCHED!


*Thanksgiving is so soon! I can't wait! Unfortunately I have to work until 2ish, but after that I get not only one but TWO Thanksgivings! Now THAT is something to be thankful for!


*In less than one month I am on Christmas break!!!! EEEK! Which means a whole months off and the end of my first semester in college! HOLY MOLY!!!!


*COME TO THE GAME TONIGHT!!!

If You Only Knew

My Complaints For The Day

>Honestly I need a stress reliever. My body hurts because I am stressed to the max. I truly feel as though I may explode. I am not liking this, not even one little bit.


>I want to go home...I am sick of school. It is driving me CRAZY! This bed kills my back, I want my puppy, and at least when I have to say goodbye to the one I love I can curl up into my squishy, soft bed with my puppy and feel a little bit better. Here I freeze in my springy bed, with NO puppy.


>Home cooked food would be lovely. When I went home Tuesday and my aunt made dinner it was godly. Good food made just for me, just how I like it, with no line to stand in.


>TV is starting to be missed. I do not watch it here because I am not going to sit in the cold common room and watch it and I am not in the mood to watch movies all the time in the room. It's whatever.


> I miss MY DD. Here I am the noob and I am not liking it anymore. People are two faced and act like they like you one minute and the next talk crap about you. I truly do not need any drama right now. At least in Auburn I know who I can trust and who I can't.


Guess I will be done for now...just not having a great day *sigh*

Sweet Sarah

Proud Air Force Girlfriend

That's what I am. A proud Air Force girlfriend. I am so proud of CJ and I know he is going to do an amazing job when he goes overseas. As his mom said, now I can get the cute tee shirts and such :)

CJ is my hero. Plain and simple. He has been through a lot the past few months, and has stuck by my side and helped me through MY problems. His family, his friends, and everyone who knows him knows how amazing he is and how he will do great when he deploys.

I love you CJ, and the next few months we will treasure and enjoy. The holidays will be amazing and very special. When it is time to say goodbye, I will keep myself together as much as I can, but my last words to you will be, "It's not goodbye, it's see you later." Whether you are gone for 14 weeks or 14 months, nothing will change in my heart. When you come home I will be overjoyed and you won't be able to get me away from you :) Kick ass baby, like you always do.

Always and Forever<3

Oh what a week/weekend

What a rough week/weekend. I found out CJ is being deployed....to Afghanistan....yeah it has been rough. But I am so proud of him. Fighting for our country is something he feels he needs to do that and I support him 100%. It is going to be very hard, but my motto is going to be, and has to be, it's not goodbye, it's see you later. I hope everyone will support him as much as his family and I and make sure you let him know.

This is a scary time for all of us. We are all nervous but all that matters is that we are there for him and support him. He could be gone for 14 months, that is a long time, but I hope everyone else has the faith that I have in knowing the time will be over before we all know it. Him and I are going to make it through this and it will make us stronger.

Adore<3